Quite a while ago now
Kitty asked me this question:
As a fellow (now expat) Radelaidean, I'd love to know how you find having such a distinct style in a town that, let's face it, is not particularly stylish or tolerant of people who stand out from the crowd.Don't get me wrong - I'll always love Adelaide, but I know from personal experience that people who look a bit different can cop a lot of stick there!I decided I would answer it in a blog post because I thought it was a very interesting question. It’s just unfortunate that it took me so long to get around to answering it!
The short answer is that I find it just fine – I never get any trouble, as such, but people do stare and quite a lot of people compliment me, too.
I’ve been dressing differently for quite a few years, now – before it became incredibly popular I had a scene/’emo’ look which most people confused for ‘goth’ but I never really got a hard time about it. My art teacher in high school used to poke a little fun at me saying things like ‘I feel sorry for you goths in summer, wearing all that black!’ Here’s some photographic evidence:
I suppose I started to move away from that style just as the term ‘emo’ was becoming a mainstream one so I think I avoided all of the negativity directed towards those who wear skinny black jeans, black eyeliner and all that jazz that came afterward.
In between that style and this one my transition period involved a bit of experimenting, some vaguely ‘indie’ styles as well as some forays into vintage inspired or Rockabilly-esque looks. There was a period of one or two years, I guess, when I didn’t really have a distinct style as such but then I realised that I not only felt more comfortable in vintage styled outfits but that fashions of the 1940s and 1950s were far more flattering for me, too. So I started to only buy things that I felt reflected that look and began to get rid of those which did not. It was quite a process, looking back on that time.
The past three years I’ve been attending
AC Arts TAFE (doing a Bachelor of Visual Arts and Design majoring in photography) and it is during this time that my style has really flourished. So, I’ve mainly been surrounded by a lot of open-minded people and I never feel out of place there, even though none of my classmates dress like me. The lecturers I’ve had have generally been rather complimentary, too. One of my favourite compliments was from the gallery director (who also lectures) when she told me that she always looks forward to seeing what I might wear next and that I was like a living work of art myself! Another time, she and another lecturer stopped me and were asking me about my stockings, etc., and commented on how my look is a full-time job. Combine that with parents who are not only very supportive but incredibly proud of me and I suppose it’s been quite easy for me to develop a fairly distinct style, without a lot of ‘hassle’.
I should also mention that, during that time, most of the places I went out to were indie clubs and I suppose I sometimes felt a little overdressed but I never felt mocked. More recently I’ve taken up swing dancing and, having braved my fear of new social settings, have attended a few of the social nights where people are really encouraged to get ‘dressed up’.
On a similar note to Kitty’s question, a girl I met a few weeks ago, who also dresses vintage, asked me ‘Do people ever ask you things like ‘What are you dressed like that for?'' I told her that I’ve never had that specific question asked but a few people have assumed that I was wearing a costume. I realised, though, whilst typing this that a guy at Jive did once ask me what I was dressed up for and I just shrugged and said ‘This is how I always dress!’ I can’t remember what his response was as I was feeling a little harassed (but only because I was merely waiting in line for a drink and didn’t much feel like talking to drunk strangers) but I know it wasn’t anything negative.
Stef did mention she thought someone once asked me if my hair was a wig and I have a vague recollection of that happening but it was either so traumatic that I’ve blocked the memory or, and this is more likely, it bothered me so little I didn’t see a point in remembering it!
Solanah, it seems you’re not the only one (though that was the only time anyone has ever asked me that!)
People do stare at me, a lot, which can get exasperating but I do dress quite differently and I do stand out so it’s only to be expected. I can’t read minds so, of course, I can’t say what these people are thinking. I have to admit sometimes I’ll be getting ready to go out and I may, for instance, want to wear a pair of cat-eye glasses and I’ll think ‘Oh, but people will stare at you if you wear something like that – it’s too outlandish!’ Then I look in the mirror, chuckle, and think again ‘Well…people stare at you, anyway, so why not just go for it?’
More than anything, I get older ladies telling me how lovely I look! It’s great when that happens but sometimes they are a tad effusive in their praise and I end up awfully embarrassed and don’t know what to say but to repeatedly say ‘Thank-you’. I’ve also had a few girls walk past me in the street and yell back at me ‘I love your dress!’
All in all, I don’t find it very difficult to dress the way I do – people either stare or are complimentary and if they are saying anything negative, then I’m blissfully unaware!
However, when I was having a chat with the singer of
Lucky Seven, I told him about this question (but not that it was asked on my blog – for some reason, I feel a little embarrassed talking about my blog in ‘real life’) and he said that sometimes when they’re all dressed up they get people yelling out things like ‘Oh, look, it’s the Blues Brothers’ or ‘Are you supposed to be the mafia?’ I wonder if they get more trouble because they are men and I’m a woman? (They always look absolutely fantastic, anyway. It’s such a pleasure to see men dress up, too).
I certainly feel lucky that, to the best of my knowledge, I don’t get any negative responses because I’ve read responses to similar questions on forums about the place and quite a few people seem not to have the same support that I do, even from their family and friends. I feel really sad about that, to tell you the truth.
What about you, my lovely blog readers? Do those of you with a distinctive style find it difficult to get along that way where you live or is not an issue?
Forgive the uncommonly wordy post – I usually like to keep my posts short and sweet, because I know that many people, such as myself, have very short attention spans but I wanted to answer this question properly. Feel free to ask any other questions, too.
I've had this all typed up and ready to go for a couple of days now and, funnily enough, I came across
this post on
Twila Jean's blog, today!
Love,
Andi B. Goode
x
Outfit details: ribbon- Spotlight; gingham shirt - Goodwill; shorts - Target; shoes - KMart.
Outfit details: ribbon- Spotlight; gingham shirt - Goodwill; shorts - Target; shoes - KMart.
